Am tired..spelt with a capital K

The motel I stayed i was nice, very clean and comfortable. However as I was settling to bed there were some people from the next room talking loudly and keeping me awake. I'd seen the guy who occupied the room as I went to mine, he was a massive Mexican, probably had a gun...or was that in my imagination. I jumped up and down on my bed and shouted"OK baby who loves a bit of Wayneo then" and a few other naughty comments. It went very quiet next door, I suspect that they were listening. Thing is I was asleep two minutes later....nothing unusual there then. I don't know where it came from, I never talk during sex,except maybe to apologise. At least I got a god nights sleep.
I met John from Channel 10, he was very nice and we did quite a few shots of me riding and chatting, it was good fun. I had some breakfast before I left Sacramento, which was fantastic....and that's where it all started t go downhill, or in this case up hill. I was fine initially then I go a puncture, my first one. I hit a grid (drain cover)and half a mile later I got that sickening feeling when your back wheel starts to slip and slide, a sure sign of a flat tyre. I fixed it under the watchful eye of Channel 10.
It was relatively flat until Plymouth then it started to climb and when I say that I mean very step. There were a few occasions when I saw dogs, not behind a fence this time, but it was too hot for them to chase me. It was a little scary though when they started barking at each other as if to pass the message on....meals on wheels approaching, ready wrapped in Lycra.
I was exhausted by about eight o clock, and miles from anywhere. I decided to camp just off road in the woods. I was too tired to worry about bears, dogs or anything else by that time. I put up my new tent and after making a complete bollocks of it at first it was easy to put up. There were some strange noises throughout the night...and that was just inside my tent, it must be these high energy bars I'm eating. At one point I'm sure I recognised the tune...yanky doodle dandy...I must have frightened all the animals away, in fact I heard something running through the bushes, but it was going away from me so I wasn't worried.